Learning English - Lesson 1

Um Eurer Englischwissen zu erweitern hier eine kleine Lektion:

Heute: ****

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "****". It is the magical word which, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.

In language, "****" falls into many Grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive (John ****ed Mary) and intransitive (Mary was ****ed by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a ****), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a ****), and adverb (Mary is ****ing interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific ****).It can also be used as an interjection (****! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy; ****, she's also stupid). As you can see there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word ****.

Aside from its sexual connotations, this word can be used to describe many situations:

1. Greetings........."How the **** are ya?"
2. Fraud............."I got ****ed by the car dealer."
3. Resignation......."Oh, **** it!"
4. Trouble..........."I guess I'm ****ed now."
5. Agression........."**** YOU!"
6. Disgust..........."**** me."
7. Confusion........."What the ****...?"
8. Displeasure......."****ing shit man..."
9. Lost.............."Where the **** are we?"
10.Disbelief........."UN****INGBELIEVABLE!!"
11. Retaliation......."Up your ****ing ass!"
12. Apathy............"Who really gives a ****?"
13. Suspicion........."Who the **** are you?"
14. Directions........"**** off."
15. It can be maternal........"MOTHER****ER!!"
16. It can be used to tell time......."It's four ****ing twenty!"
17. It can be used as an anatomical description............."He's a ****ing asshole."

Lastly, it has been used by many notable people throughout history:

"What the **** was that?" ~Mayor of Hiroshima~
"Thats not a real ****ing gun." ~John Lennon~
"Where the **** is all this water coming from?" ~Captain of the Titanic~
"Who the **** is gonna find out?" ~Richard Nix on~
"Any ****ing idiot could answer that." ~Albert Einstein~
"It does so ****ing look like her!" ~Picasso~
"You want what on the ****ing ceiling?"´~Michaelangelo~
"**** a duck." ~Walt Disney~
"Houston, we have a big ****ing problem." ~The crew of Apollo 13~